Thursday, November 18, 2010

A Small Revalation of Sorts

This week has not been the best week for me. I've had multiple assignments due which means a crazy amount of work and as mentioned previously, an issue with one of my closest friends here. We talked tonight, and it'll be okay, but we both need some time to get back to where we were. However, I was still pretty upset about it and the conversation ended with me going back up to my room and crying. I was texing Patrick (also known as Mystery Badger) and he was being so sweet about everything.

I decided I would spend the rest of my night in my room on my laptop trying to get homework done. About a half an hour in, no homework had even been started and I was still just as upset when my phone rang. It was Patrick, telling me that I was going to meet him and Molly, a good friend in the making, at Einsteins, our library's version of Starbucks and a favorite place for students, to do some homework. I didn't want to, but he was a little insistent so I figured after making him listen to me being all sad I could at least agree to meet him.

I'm so happy I did. I ended up running into a few other friends, talking with people, laughing, and even got a little homework done. By the time one am came around and they were kicking us out I was laughing and smiling and feeling much more like myself. I thanked Patrick for making me come out about 50 times, but he deserved it.

So here's the part where my revalation comes into play: As I've said before, this is my fresh new start. I'm still working through the past and that will take a long time but I'm working on it and I'm making sure to do things differently here. Yeah, bad things are still going to happen. Upsetting things too. But what I realized tonight is that it's already different. Had this been high school, none of my friends would have called to make me go out. They would have let me be in my room alone. Here, I have people who care enough about me to do something to make me feel better. I have people that I can trust. I have people that think I matter. Because I do. Things may not be perfect, nor do I want them to be, but I'm still a pretty lucky girl.

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